Feel the Fear and Do it anyway
The essence and meaning of courage
Many equate courage with feeling brave and fearless. When they feel fear before taking a risk, some people conclude that they are cowards. We gain a far more powerful perspective when we see courage as doing what we choose to do, even when we feel afraid.
Most people who ascend to the top ranks of their field feel fear
A famous actor can quake in his boots with stage fright before the curtain rises and a skilled teacher can anxiously dread the first day of school even after 30 years in the classroom. Even after decades of success, these people might find that their careers sometimes scare the socks off of them. They feel fear and choose to do what they fear anyway.
Most of us have had this kind of experience at one time or another. We have gone for job interviews, scared so silly that we were not even sure if we can remember our name. Yet we go through the ordeal anyway - and even get hired. The times when we felt the fear and still did what needed doing exemplify the essence and meaning of courage.
Don't worry about fixing feelings
The notion that courage is about our behaving in the face of fear is so basic, so obvious, that it may barely seem worth mentioning. Think again. We have gone through several decades of self-help books, tapes and seminars that focus on feelings. A common theme of these self-help messages is that we should get in touch with our feelings. Express our feelings, own our feelings, pound our fists, shake, cry and above all, feel our feelings.
Feel the Feelings - then act anyway
Feelings seem to be beyond our direct control, as fickle, unpredictable and unstable as the weather. Feelings can be totally unrelated to external circumstances. People can have thousands of dollars in the bank and still feel poor. They can have a stack of party invitations and still feel lonely. They can have five degrees and a wall full of diplomas and still feel ignorant.
Actions are much different from feelings
While feelings often elude our direct control, we can always claim full responsibility for our actions. We can feel depressed and still choose to do the laundry. We can feel homesick and still choose to do homework. We can feel lazy and still choose to mow the lawn. We can feel fear and still choose to confess our mistakes.
We can act independently of our feelings
We can fully experience our feelings, know all the details about them and choose to act independently about it. This comes in handy when we feel the tenacious grip of negative feelings, such as fear or anxiety. There is nothing we have to do first in order to gain courage -- all that is required is for us to use the skill we already have and apply it to more and more situations in our life.
Courage is not a mysterious quality that is denied to the masses and dispensed to a chosen few. Courage is a gift each of us has already been granted. We have used it before and it is waiting to be used again whenever we choose.
To your ongoing success,
Warmly,
Coach Regina
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Ready to make a positive change in your life or at work? Looking for reinforcement in achieving your goals? Not sure if a life coach is for you? Please contact me, Coach Regina, for an absolutely free consultation.
Phone: 321-246-7066 | e-mail: regina@mypersonalitycoach.com