Overcoming Rejection

"The ages old fear of rejection and how to overcome that down in the belly negative feeling that comes when you put your talents on the line and they are rejected. What part of us is actually being rejected?"

Try this vision: What is real... at this moment you have certain talents and abilities, hopes and dreams, needs and values. You have family and friends that care about you. You have accomplished great things in life; be it your academic track record, your employment history, your ability to be a team player, a leader, a parent and trusted partner ... with many other talents you learned along the way. The concrete evidence of your existence thus far proves that you are capable of tackling the world and what it has handed you... wouldn't you say that you can  actually be proud of who you have become?

Now take one small action such as opening a letter saying you were not selected for the job you applied for, you did not get that promotion, your business proposal was rejected or you did not get into the school of your dreams. What happens? The air is knocked out of you, suddenly that lead feeling in your gut is taking over. The act of reading one letter has changed "I am ok" into I am not good enough!

In reality you are still this very capable and loved person. What has changed is simply your attitude. You have allowed yourself to take the rejection personally. Suddenly your internal dialoge is about you not being good enough, when moments before you were just fine. You have given your power away because of someone else’s action.

Fact is that another person had a stronger set of tools for this particular situation, or perhaps there was a personal contact that was selected or the person making the decision had a bad day the day of your interview, we will never know... so let's get over it and strengthen our confidence.

We meet rejections every day, whether it is of our dreams, of a new job, a promotion or a sale we have endeavored to close. So here are 3 simple rules to dealing with rejection successfully:

Don’t take Rejection Personally!

It is rarely about us, even though our egos try to tell us so. Our minds are most creative and energetic and if left alone, are masters at the negative - what I like to call our “Pity Committee”. Replace your "Pity Committee" with a sensible group of voices: which include your INTUITION, your HEART, your INTELLIGENCE, your CURIOSITY, your PASSION, your SPIRIT and your EXPERIENCE.

Use Rejection as a Learning Tool

Your new “Success Committee”, will help you deal with rejection as a learning tool. Ask questions when you receive a no. What did not meet your needs? What was missing so I might improve? Rarely is a person reluctant to help another improve. Then set up an appropriate action plan to carry out what you have discovered. Choose to learn from the rejection and move on to the next with a greater arsenal of tools for your future success.

Change your Internal Dialog and move on to the next Challenge

Establish a solid awareness that negative feelings caused by rejection are the result of your internal dialog going down the wrong track. Create a plan of action how to stop talking yourself down and implement a healthy internal dialog instead. Establish a new set of supportive thoughts and habits that support you well. For assistance and more information feel free to contact us for a free consultation.

If you found this information helpful then we'd appreciate it if you would share it with your contacts, family or friends.

To Your Ongoing Success!

Coach Regina

Regina Erhart Fasold

International Executive Career Consultant

Executive Performance Coach

www.ReginaFasold.com
+1 321.246.7066